When traveling, be it across the town, country or to a different country, Eoin will always be instinctively drawn to a karaoke bar. The trip to Liverpool for his stag weekend was no different, albeit except for this time having 11 fellas in tow. Jupiters is near the town hall (if I remember correctly), off a busy street down a suspiciously dimly lit alleyway. It seems to be behind and / or next to a couple more bars that were somewhat deserted when the 12 of us made our way to do some singing.
From the outset, Jupiters seemed a little on the ‘in need of TLC’ side of the spectrum. It is, for want of a more eloquent phrase, in need of sprucing up a bit. Nevertheless, we all crowded in amid various stares from the crowd already in there and found a spot next to the pool table big enough to accommodate our group. The bar staff were pleasant, very inquisitive as to exactly what kind of liquid was spilled on the pool table at one stage, but hugely pleasant.
Jupiters is more of a specialty bar than anything else. It caters for two specific types of people in todays modern society. Those that like karaoke, and those that chose the path of homosexuality. It was certainly a new experience; Perhaps the first and only ever gay karaoke bar I’d ever been in. At first the thought lingered somewhat, but it was eventually ‘rammed home’ that it was a gay karaoke bar two gentlemen positioned themselves at the corner of the pool area (that is, the area with the pool table) and proceeded to pay very close attention to a few members of our party that were engaged in a pool mini-tournament.
The owner of the bar, who made great strides to assure us of her heterosexuality for some reason, was a very pleasant woman whose patience it seemed has no boundaries. She gave us free disposable cameras and free condoms, both of which were in abundant supply in the pub. Best not to ask too many questions about that one I’d say…
Eoin, master of the faux pas, then went on to perform a stirring rendition of “Piano Man” with a silver foil wrapped packet of condoms peeking out from the top of his shirt pocket. It seemed to scream “Come get me”. The crowd applauded. Somewhere, in the corner of the room, 11 men were doubled over in pain from laughing. All the while it seemed he was blissfully unaware of the orientation of much of the clientèle. Lucky for him he’s not pretty.
Numerous fantastic photos and a few pints of John Smiths later, we said our goodbyes to the barmaids and were on our way. Jupiters was surely a fun place to visit but I don’t think I’ll be back anytime soon. One reason would be I don’t sing karaoke. Another would be I’m not in Liverpool. It could do with a lick of paint and maybe a contract cleaner for the pool table, but other than that, it’s fine. Not everyone’s cup of tea but a friendly place to croon along badly to some songs.
Finally, and something I’ll possibly never understand, is the group of lads that came in to play pool after we had finished with the table. The three of them began a game and midway through it one turned around to someone in our group and said “Ere mate, I ‘ope you’re not lookin’ at our aaaarses”. Now if you’re a homophobe, why ever would you play pool in a gay bar? The only table in Liverpool? I very much doubt it. So far back in the closet they’re in Narnia I reckon.
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